Comparing photography and dating seems like an unlikely parallel, but hear me out.
You hop on a dating site hoping to meet the love of your life or, at least, someone to pass the time with. You find your perfect match, exchange a few introductory emails, and find yourself excited to meet and get to know this person.
The person on the other end of the computer asks to meet you on Saturday afternoon at the local coffee shop. You scour the internet for the perfect outfit and a new pair of shoes. When you find what you want, you close your laptop and begin daydreaming about the amazing date scheduled for the weekend, the attractive person you're about to meet, and the future you have together. You've planned the wedding before you've even completed date number one.
Friday night you send a text over to your new crush to confirm a time and location for the next day. Despite checking your phone every five minutes for a new message, you find none. Maybe your new love is busy or maybe your phone is broken. You fight the urge to send another message, or worse, call. After a few hours of stressing out, you head to bed excited to wake up to a message informing you that the person on the other end is looking forward to meeting you.
Alas, your phone remains message-free in the morning. Your heart pounds, you feel butterflies in your stomach, and you dial their number, only to be sent directly to voicemail.
Ghosted. Again.
You may not see the connection to dating, as it isn't apparent Let me explain...
As a photographer, I often get inquiries via email and social media, asking about my prices, my services, what locations I travel to, what ideas I may have, etc. I expect people to hear about my prices and ghost me. I'm ok with that. I charge my worth, I am not within everyone's budget, and I know my style may not be for everyone.
Then there are those times when the ideal, perfect client reaches out to you. You know their look and style will help elevate your profile and attract more clients. They inquire about pricing and you provide them with options. They respond with enthusiasm about the shoot and excitement to work with you. They ask for style suggestions, and you send a board with options that will stand out in the location, coordinate the family members, and result in perfect images.
You reach an agreement on a date and time with the new client of your dreams, create the session on your scheduling software, and send off the request for the retainer to secure the date and time. The client leaves you on read.
Not wanting to look desperate or insane, you wait a few days. You craft a message that lets the client know that you are so excited to work with them, but that the retainer needs to be paid before proceeding, otherwise, it's still available to other clients.
Nothing. Left on read again.
It appears the perfect client is now slipping away. You know your value and do not want to keep reaching out, but you also fell in love with the client and what they had to offer. After two weeks, you decide to give it one more shot, write a message selling yourself and explaining why you are the perfect fit, and close your message with, "Please shoot me a quick message to let me know if you've changed your mind."
Nothing. Ghosted. Just like dating.
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